Elegy for the Gods

Between the dying stars we’ll fly,
To see, to be, to live, to die.
For we are the Gods, immortal and alone,
With endless power and undisputed throne.

No war so fierce that we can’t win,
No deed so foul we call it sin,
No rule so strict that we can’t break,
No keep so strong that we can’t take.

And still in this age of our reign,
Our happiness is naught but feign,
For a thought did strike us on our throne,
You may be Gods, you’re still alone...

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all poems here are owned by respective owners....

CrY...

Tears blur the words

As my heart is bled

Onto the page

A bitter river of my emotion

I cannot sleep

My thougts consume

Twisting within my mind

As the dam breaks and floods my consciousness

For the world, no for me

My self-pity sickens me

My eyes release the waterfall

And my soul stains the pillow

The burning inside me

Doused by this nightly rain

The flames are quicly stayed

Before they engulf me

A sea so beautiful to me

but a pool of sewage to all others

I swim aloneLost in this ocean

They see not the poetry in tears

And so as I swim

They drown

In an attempt to stay dry

HATE pierces like RAZOR BLADES

I see these cruel people
they treat me unjust and unequal
They treat me in society as if I'm their slave
With these hateful strong chains
Binding me to the ground
While they kick my emotional spine out
TEARING ME INSIDE
TEARING AND CLAWING AWAY AT MY PRIDE
They eat it and spit it back in my face
Only to knock me down again and walk away
With their sick exasperated devilish smile
I would love to make my hate all worthwhile
But I won't cuz I can't feel like I'm cold inside
Despite all the progressive hate locked on me
Like a magnet to a magnet
The hate is pulling me closer to despair
But I don't wish to ever go there
I want to snap OUT OF THIS OLD SHELL
And get out of my own personal hell
BINDING ME
BLINDING ME
FRYING ME
I'm dying inside SEE
And they just scrape my soul onto my grave
Only to bury me and throw the happiness I had away
Am I serene now?Do I feel down?
The head that wore the devil's crown will be broken
The hate shall not be spoken
But the deed to be stronger will be done
I won't let all this rage and hate and fear make my insides rip out and become numb

♦ I AM ♦

i am an echo...
words whispered by countless others...
tossed and beaten on the rocksthat rise to infinity...

i am the wind...
unseen yet heard...
untouched yet felt...
unbidden yet welcomed...

i am inspiration...
creation and destruction...
through me lives the abstract...
i radiate feeling...

i am unique...
the sum of my existence...
none have taken my path...
none will follow...

i am the omega...
finality and eternity...
i walk the stars...
the little cosmos...

i am human...
trial and error...
love and loss...
striving for infinity...

i am in love...
i walk the rosy path...
my soul is home...
i am complete

.: Asleep Yet AwaKe :.

I want to love

But I am too tired

To tired to reach out

I want to feel loved

But everyone is in thier own groups

To involved to become individuals and think thier own thoughts

I want to be free

But I am tied down on the rocks

To be pounded by thoughts of an uncontrolled mind

I want to grasp me

To know my center

But I am blinded

I want to know my world

To know what is making the waves in my mind

But it is changing too fast

??!!Insanity!!??

My darkest soul whispers my name,

My mind screams the same,

My sins shout my blame and shame,

Insanity is so hard to tame...

Randomn outbreaks to shout, laugh or cry,

The feeling of wanting to die.

My mind is playing tricks on me,I don't know who I should believe,

Or if I should trust anything I see.

But Insanity is Beautiful,Like Summer Rain...I

t's so Beautiful,It just makes me scream for more pain...

...Epilogue of a Break-up...

How do you trace a scream?

Such subtle lines that softly blur;

a moment designated to singby beautyor ugly:

a lily lying in a field.

Sometimesshe wishes on the leftovers

of last nights rain.

Closer to starlight than starswith two weeks of tracing,

screams singing:

"We can't talk about it now.

We can't talk about it now."

--Clarity--

Existence is not.

Life is.

Scarred by the legends of tomorrow, wreaths of immortality echo.

Silently.

Stirred by the rustlings of darkened day, Dawn sleeps-

Unawakened

By the stealthy dusk, in its tiptoeing madness;

A frenzy of tap-dancing raindrops fall

As the broken sun fades Casting clouds of burnt amberInto galaxies of no colour.

Yet death survives from the futures past.

A broken world- illusions dream

Realitys curse, shrouded in torment?

The warmth of heavens deepest hellsends

crawling shivers

through the minds cold embrace.

Whispered screams fill the stifling void,

as clammy oceans give up their frozen memories.

To be free from reality is to be chained to eternity.

Forever bound, in a mental liberty that few ever realise-

For most exist

Yet do not live

Butterflies are dying today

I thinkthe butterflies are dying today

They scratch at my windows

with their tissue paper wings

Screaming into my dreams

Today is the day, I think they say

But in the morning the glass is silent

And all I see left arefragments of kaleidoscopes

no hopes

Only powder stains

remain.

::FRiENdS::

Friends are the only angels
We’ll ever get to see
While still on earth
While we still can breath

They’re there for us
Through thick and thin
They light our way
When our path is dim

To hold your hand
To counsel you through
To help you out
To hold to you true

They’re God’s little gift
To show you He’s there
They’re his angel’s to you
To show you that he does care

?? Your Friend??

Once a teardrop leaves your eye;
it continues to flow to your neckline
and when it does, it leaves a mark
a path of sadness in your heart.

Water as it cleans your soul
Fire as it melts you down
Ever so clear that the reflections are
your greatest nightmares stabbed behind.

Someone judged you of who you are
Gave his word and bid goodbye
turned his back and took your place
Your friend disappears without a trace.

You apologized but is denied
Unspoken thoughts run across your mind
Unforgiven you stand up high
A silent war has begun.

.: If I Were To Die :.

If I were to die, right now…

What exactly would happen?

Would I be top of the news?

Head line story
Death of Fame and Glory
Everyone feeling sorry
Even the girl down the street, Lorie

Would no one care?

Just another dead waste
Guy with no taste
Waste of a case
Guy born and died with no home or base

Would people even know?

The forgotten one
One man who’s done
Some forgotten son
None ever called him “Hun”

…Or even remembered?

Who was that guy…
The guy who died
No guy died, you lied
Musta had my tongue tied

It would happen so fast…

No one would know
Who my love was fo’
Even tho
The guy was twisted and low

But that’s just a theory, with a bit of fear and wonder

I have people that love me
People that support me
Serve me morning tea
Talk and laugh with me
Days full of glee

I’m so happy to be alive…

Death is too sad of a topic
My happiness is on a level of “thick”
The only thing is, I’m lovesick
For a loving, caring chick

?? Do They??

do they miss me
do I ever cross their mind
do they ever think back
to our crazy times
do they close their eyes
and smile...
or are they glad to be rid of me..
oh i wish i knew...
if they do...
because if they don't...
I must be wishing my life away
and I wanna go back someday
but it seems i have to stay..
so far away..
do they miss me?
do they care..
have I been replaced?
oh how I want to be there..
and of all of the things im my head I say...
do they...

.:Tragic Happiness:.

I thought I’d found the perfect friend,
But it all turned out to be pretend.
Shall I tell you story of my life,
That was once joyful and full of strife.

It all happened one glorious day,
When the birds sang, and on the sand I lay.
Thinking of the warm Tropical breeze,
Rustling thorough the fresh Angsana leaves.
I felt the wind brush against my tender cheek,
And opened my eyes to take a little peek

To my utter surprise, I saw the Bully named Brice.
Edging towards me with that stare in his eyes.
I scurried to my feet,
He said I was ‘dead meat’
Afraid as I was, I turned around.
I tried to run, but my feet stuck to the ground.
My body went limp and my knees gave way,
I collapsed to the ground, Brice had nothing to say.
I know myself that I had a really weak heart,
I collapsed on my own, but Brice played a part.
Everything around me just went--blank,
And into a deep dark hole I sank.
Just as I thought giving up was my choice,
All at once I heard this angelic voice.
She told me that giving up, I should never do,
That voice gave me wings, and then I flew.

When I opened my eyes and glanced around,
I noticed that I wasn’t on the ground.
I felt someone clutching my hand,
It was the girl, the voice I heard on the sand.
She looked at me with the utmost glee,
She seemed so happy, even happier than me.
She gave out the most radiant glow,
Just like a beautiful after-storm rainbow.
She was the girl that had saved my life,
But into my heart down plunged a knife.
She looked so hippy, so jazzy, so cool.
Why would she be friends with me, a complete fool?

But then she told me that I was really silly,
She didn’t care about her looks or being hippy.
All she wanted was a friend, who is true,
That will cheer her up whenever she’s blue.
That was when I’d knew I’d found her,
And I told her, “No matter what, we’d be together”.

She was the best friend I ever had.
She said to me,” you never make me mad!”
That smile was always on her face,
Even when we had the marathon race.
But one day, it was destined to change….

I was waiting for her in the garden at our usual lunch spot,
Wishing she would hurry up, I wanted to tell her a lot.
Then I spotted her with the ‘posh’ gang in our school.
I ran up to her, and the gang of cool.
They pushed me away, and I fell to the floor.
I looked at my friend, but she had slammed the door.
The door to her heart had been sealed by coldness,
She had forgotten her true nature and lost all her kindness.
She threw me an icy cold cruel stare,
She’d forgotten the times we use to share.
Still on the floor, I watched her walk away,
To the other side of the street where she could play.

Five long years since then has past,
Oh, doesn’t the time fly fast?
I’ve grown a lot since then,
But I’ve never forgotten my dear, dear friend.

The shock of my life has yet to come,
And when I think of it my senses go numb.
As I was strolling down the neighborhood street,
I could hear the lone footsteps of my very feet.
All of a sudden, I saw a car crashing,
Believe me it was really very, very frightening.
I hurried to the ruined car,
And managed to save her out of the tar.
I held her in my arms,
As she mumbled something about farms.
I calmed her down and dragged her aside,
So I could attend to her, but then she cried.
The injuries in her torso were so severe,
But suddenly on her face a smile did appear.
And all at once I remembered the smile,
The smile of my best friend when I was a child.
She looked at me with the happiest glance,
I think she knew it was her last chance.
She pulled me closer so I could hear,
Her last words were only for me,
There was happiness in her, I could see.
“I’m so sorry, please forgive me. Goodbye, and best friends forever!”
It was only then did I realize our friendship was like a feather,
It’s really beautiful, but it can disappear just like that.
I hope she rests in peace, and is happy with her cat.

Now all alone in the snow I think of her,
The summer has gone and winter is here.
I’ll never forget my dear old friend,
Who always lent me a helping hand.
I hope she’s watching me from above,
Giving me all the protection and love.
I wish she were still here today,
So I can meet her and then I’d say
“ Of course I forgive you, you know I do”
“ You’re my best friend and I love you”

The Hero...

I am the Hero,
A source of hope and light
I hear their cries up to the heavens
And come with strength to calm their plight.

I am the Hero
Always there to save the day.
Because when the dark clouds come
It's me that sees them blown away.

Day to day I help them,
And stand for all.
That is the Hero's job, you know,
To help other when they fall.

I am the Hero
Saving's what I do best.
The peace I want is sacrificed
To make sure all others see rest.

I am the Hero.
And though I'm adored still
Concern pushes their love away and
Loneliness descends, against my will.

Do they ever wonder?
Will they ever see in me?
The paint that haunts me everyday
That a hero is all I'll ever be?

But I must still stand.
Show no fear and right the wrongs.
Because a Hero with a weakness
Is not a Hero very long.

I am the Hero
But I'm still human too.
So what will happen on that day
When everything for me falls through?

I am the Hero
But how much longer can I stand?
They are hypocrites, and will not be
Below to catch me when I land.
I'll go down, I know
It's true, for that’s a Hero's destiny
And I'll be beaten to the ground
By too strong an enemy.

And on that day, as I lay
With my shattered hope and broken limbs,
I'll watch as they leave the Has-Been Hero,
And let the Loneliness step in.

And that’s when I will say…

"I am the Hero
And I stand for all
So tell me, please tell me,
Who stands for me when I fall?"

I am the Hero…

... Hate ...

I hate the way you look at me,
I hate the way you try to talk to me.
You have created so many scars,
And yet you keep trying.
The scars I carry on my heart,
On my soul,
Are from you.
I gave you a second chance,
And now I regret it.
I hate the way I had trusted you,
I hate the way I still like you.
I hate my self for letting you get close.
I let down my barriers,
For the first time,
Breathing in fresh air.
Why?
I hate the way you had run away,
I hate the way you had said nice things.
And yet I want you to come back.
I had showed my other side,
My fur covered side.
I hate the way you had looked at me,
Fear and hate building up.
I hate you,
And yet I don’t.
I hate the way you had patted my back when I cried,
I hate the way you smile.
But do I really?
Do I really hate you,
If I want you to come back?
How can I hate you?
But I want to,
I really do but I can’t.
I hate the way you had said you loved me,
I hate the way you had shared my happiness.
I keep telling myself over and over again,
I hate you,
I hate you.
But,
I don’t,
and I know it.
I hate,
Loving you…
I hate it.
Loving you and,
I hate it.

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HateI hate the way you look at me, I hate the way you try to talk to me. You have created so many scars, And yet you keep trying. The scars I carry on my heart, On my soul, Are from you. I gave you a second chance, And now I regret it. I hate the way I had trusted you, I hate the way I still like you. I hate my self for letting you get close. I let down my barriers, For the first time, Breathing in fresh air. Why? I hate the way you had run away, I hate the way you had said nice things. And yet I want you to come back. I had showed my

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... Hold On..

There's always gonna be Someone around Someone who never ever fails to Get you down There's always gonna be Some wolf waiting outside your door Some sick dog always trying to Get the best of you But I hope you know I will never be that guy I will never be that monster Waiting to devour all your dreams And I hope you know You've got what it takes To pull through and make it To the top where you belong To the top where you should have been All along There's always gonna be A reason to say you had a bad day A reason that blots out the sun Keeping you down and lonely But never forget As dark as the night can be Stars will always light the way Back to me And I hope you know I will never be that guy I will never be that monster Waiting to devour all your dreams And I hope you know You've got what it takes To pull through and make it To the top where you belong To the top where you should have been All along I hope you realize You are better than this That there will always be a shoulder here Made custom just for you Just enough to absorb All your tears.

Contrary and Scary

Contrary and scary,
I've always been very
different from my peers.

Lately I've noticed
as my eyes focus,
the way I've lived my years.

I've never feared
being so weird;
I think it's quite a treat.

It isn't flawed
just to be odd
compared to those you meet.

I'm never scared
to be compared
to those who are arranged,

because I'm glad
to be the lad
they all think is strange.

I'm not scary;
Quite the contrary,
to what you might have heard.

My wires are crossed;
I'm slightly lost,
for lack of better words.

To wear the mask
is quite a task;
your face suites not the crowd.

It scares them so;
The things you know
when you are not allowed.

My soul is free
and full of glee,
despite my troubled ways.

Through eyes of black
I give them back
their pedestal today.

If I could scream
and kill my dream,
I think I'd do without.

If I can be free,
forever I'll be
The infamous "odd-man out."

... Unheard Melodies ....

You stand in feigned indifference
while I stand in mock defeat.

We both stare ahead with empty pride,
yet you're the one who has been beat.

You never gave me freedom,
and I never said a word.

And now this false bond of trust
is something that has just been stirred.

Fine, let's keep it this way,
I'll sing my dismal song

Like the desperate plea
of an unheard bird
that you failed to notice.

...I Need A Healer...

Who are you to tell me to heal?
My soul was wounded long ago.
Can't get over it.
Won't get over it.
And the screaming overthrows.

Voices called..
Alone at night,
Snow fell on my windowsill.
But this is California, It never snows here.

I need a shaman...
To teach me the way.
I need a healer...
To live another day.
I need to worship...
Something unknown.
I need to swallow pills...
Until I'm full grown.

What man would stay with someone so broken?
Someone who grabs my hands and steals away the pain.
What man would want to save my life,
After I ran....from my state of recovery?

He needs to wake up...
PLEASE BABY WAKE UP!
And He could wake me from the dead...
And he could give me somewhere to rest my head....
And he healed my life that way..
He took the pain away...
Please Baby Wake up.....


I NEED A boy,
Who's tortured but strong.
I need a man,
Who can hold on.
I need a guy,
One Just like Shawn.
But he's a character on some tv show.

I need a man,
Just like Piper has.
One who can save me from myself.
And even if ... I want to be normal.
He says"Being different is where your powers come from"

A boy like Leo....

I want my Shawn.....

These Visions of snow....
These images of my heart that glows.
These wings....
That have turned black.
These dreams that were stolen.
I hope someday you'll know them all....

Daddy.... Why did you hurt me like that?
Daddy... Why did you hit me so fast?
Daddy... Why did you throw me down,
And you ripped off my clothes till I screamed and I was bleeding....
You left me ravaged and pleading... "Daddy...Why?"

Daddy... I remember everything..
Daddy... Why would you want to kill my mommy?
Oh, Daddy, Get off the meth...
I saw you Jawing. Shooting up.
I saw you fall you left me to call out "DADDY!
What do you say?
I'm glad I didn't have to see you after that day...
Oh Why would you hurt me so much?


I need some love...
From a boy...
That can heal the delusion,
That can make life more than an illusion..
I need someone...
To hold my hand..
But who would stay after me telling them the things I never should have said?
Because of Daddy.....



He needs to wake up...
PLEASE BABY WAKE UP!
And He could wake me from the dead...
And he could give me somewhere to rest my head....
And he healed my life that way..
He took the pain away...
Please Baby Wake up.....




I walked a thousand miles until blood was in my shoes.
I cut the cares away,
I tied myself to truth....
I need someone..
Like Leo OR Shawn..

I need a shaman...
To teach me the way.
I need a healer...
To live another day.
I need to worship...
Something unknown.
I need to swallow pills...
Until I'm full grown.


What man would stay with someone so broken?
Someone who grabs my hands and steals away the pain.
What man would want to save my life,
After I ran....from my state of recovery?


They say I'm crazy..
WELL WOULDN'T YOU BE TOO?
They say I'm hopeless..
But I have been through so much,..
So much no one really knows..
Well wouldn't you be HOPELESS TOO?

Quench the thirst....
Oh baby...
Please just quench the thirst...

He needs to wake up...
PLEASE BABY WAKE UP!
And He could wake me from the dead...
And he could give me somewhere to rest my head....
And he healed my life that way..
He took the pain away...
Please Baby Wake up.....

Quench the thirst....